Monday, September 14, 2015

Things I Suck At

One of the pitfalls of following the old Socratic advice "Know thyself" is being forced to realize that when it comes to doing somethings, we have to realize that we suck at them. And the reflexive reaction is "Oh my God! I can't do this! This is awful!" But is that a valid and appropriate response? Learning not to give a darn works even better!

1.  I will cheerfully admit right here and now that I suck at writing cursive! Oh, the shame! I can imagine nuns shaking their heads in frustration that Tee Angel, soon to be a troublesome pupil, could just not learn to write like a little lady! This is what comes from too much M.T.V., too much idle time, being allowed to be a tomboy, and not enough time praying! But, in reality, is writing cursive such a big deal? Anyway, I think in Comic Sans MS!

2.  Sports talk. Oh, I can play lip service; and I sort of follow the Tigers and the Saints. But sports talk is such a foreign language in which there is little in the way of a helpful phrase book. Could some write a Sports Talk to English jack? I must say that soccer is beyond me. And baseball brings out logorrhea in some people.

3.  Sewing. Apparently this useful skill isn't hereditary.

4.  Keeping a neat checkbook. I just pray that my outgo is less than my income. No, I'm not inclined to OCD. I always wind up with two or three checks unaccounted for until the monthly statement comes in.

5.  Sitting like a lady. I sometimes hook a leg over a chair arm, sit with my knees apart, slouch, and wiggle my foot.

6.  Keeping quiet in meetings. Thus far it hasn't gotten me in trouble. Especially if I toss in a little Yat Speak now and then.

7.  Tolerance for long-winded speeches or sermons. Keep it SHORT, buster! Get to the point!

8.  But I mostly suck at wearing heels! I feel like I'm walking on stilts when I wear heels, especially 4-inch ones, and risk pratfalls and insecurity. What if I split my jeans?


Linda Kay said...

Angel, you sound like my youngest granddaughter. She is happiest out at the horse farm, messing with the horses, which is her second job. She loves her jeans and boots. The good thing is that cursive is becoming a thing of the past. There is no cursive taught in schools in Texas now, at least not the public schools. It must be a huge relief for the teachers!

Big Sky Heidi said...

I don't do cursive, either. And high heels give me sore ankles! I'm glad things are more informal here.

Mike said...

I think I scribble neater than I write cursive.

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

I sucks that they still demand cursive! And high heels are passe in today's informal workplaces.

Kristen Drittsekkdatter said...

Sitting with your legs apart and up is okay if you're not wearing a skirt, I suppose. You Southern girls are so informal.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Well, wearing high heels is ridiculous and bad for spine, so there's no need to be ashamed of not being able to do that. (I make an exception for the dominatrix who treads on her clients' flesh while wearing stilettos. ) I don't see anything wrong with wiggling your legs either - a woman should allow the air to circulate between her thighs.

Duckbutt said...

I almost never wrote in cursive as a professor back in the day. Only my signature.

Dixie@dcrelief said...

Why the heck do I feel like the list fairy stole my list and posted it here?? i love heels, but now-days, fall over too much.


Bilbo said...

My cursive writing always starts off reasonably legible, but (as Linda Kay and Mike can tell you) tends to get worse in the course of a handwritten letter. But it's perfectly okay for signing checks.