Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Freedom Fries, Freedom Toast, and Other Nomenclature Changes

Years ago (around 2003 or so), when the U.S. wasn't getting along very well with France, a dutiful congressperson proposed that French fries be henceforth referred to as "Freedom Fries."  Presumably, this would apply to French toast as well.

There's a little bit of irony here: Both French fries and French toast originated in BELGIUM!

At least we got the Belgian waffle right!

But what about another alleged entity from the hexagone: the French tickler?  Did this get overlooked during this period of jingoism, bad taste, and questionable nomenclature change?

No.  "The Bedroom Bunker," an adult pleasure store in Colorado Springs, found that sales of French ticklers dropped due to anti-French sentiment.  In response to this, they renamed their latex-studded vibrators "Freedom ticklers."  This product was already colored red, white, and blue.

Which also happen to be the colors on the French flag!
The Freedom Tickler



Curiously enough, I don't think anyone saw fit to refer to "Freedom kissing" instead of "French kissing."  Perhaps the practice of French kissing is still viewed as morally questionable by a number of people that they are still very willing to impute Gallic origins to that mutually delicious activity.

I wonder what "English kissing" would be like.


Chuck Bear said...

English kissing would be as bland as their food.

Freedom ticklers. I like that.

Chuck Bear said...
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Chuck Bear said...
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Atomic Dog said...

When the silliness regarding French fries was going on, I wondered where that would ultimately go.

Grand Crapaud said...

It's a way of combining sex and patriotism. Three cheers for the red, while, and blue. (George M. Cohan music for background.)

Anemone said...

French ticklers and other ribbed rubbers are overrated.

The Bastard King of England said...

Do French ticklers involve the placebo effect?

Mike said...

Red white and blue are the most common colors for flags of the countries of the world.

Bilbo said...

If I, as an American, French-kiss my German wife, am I beng insufficiently sexually patriotic? Ask me if I care.

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

What? Are there people who object to French kissing? They might also object to sex while standing. People might think they're dancing.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Mike, a good point. The product could also be sold as Norwegian ticklers.

Bilbo, I would not presume to doubt.

Chuck, I never tried it.

King, that would require research.

Cloudia said...

Legendary bad English teeth preclude my thinking much about your estimable query, scholar!

ALOHA from Honolulu

Insane Penguin said...

They forgot to rename French bulldogs Freedom bulldogs.