Friday, October 18, 2013

A Strange Proposal to Be a Footnote in History

There's the Guinness Book of Records, an amazing collection of feats both remarkable and amazing, that some people aspire to being mentioned in for some reason or other. It seems that someone has recently achieved temporary immortality by accomplishing the feat of unhooking 26 brassieres in a minute's time! Now who thinks of such things; and isn't this one of those occasions where just possibly quality is more of a consideration than is quantity?

But was going to be in black and white in the Guinness Book for all to read. And will stay that way until some more enterprising (and manually dexterous) person breaks that record. That sort of thing tempts the enterprising. It's like the Matterhorn: people climb it because it's there.

Anyway, I was approached to be one of the, shall we say, providers of said objects to be publicly unhooked in a local tavern. It was by a friend of mine, a trustworthy sort, a café latte man. It was presented to be as an occasion to help a local Louisianian win fame and glory in doing this feat. It was supposed to be done demurely, with each the assisting ladies lifting up the back of her tee to help our hero set a new record of 30, or even 35! Afterwards, modestly shielding ourselves, we then run to the room of rest for reassembly. The thought of so many in there simultaneously boggled the imagination!

What a rush! To be an accessory to fame! Would I be mentioned in the Times-Picyaune? [Angel B., daughter of Mr. and Mrs. B, a graduate of ______ Academy and the University of ______ was the eighteenth one undone.] Would WDSU-TV cover it live?

Would my grandchildren hear about it someday?

"You know, Cherie, it was Maw-maw, she was a demoiselle of considerable style. She participated in the great bra unhooking of 2008."

"Cool. Can I have a picture for Show-and-Tell?"


"No, but you can take her souvenir t-shirt for having participated."

11 comments:

Insane Penguin said...

Which one is you? Can we have a frontal view? :)

MarkD60 said...

This should be mandatory training for teenage boys. I remember how impossible it was to unsnap those evil mechanisms.

TexWisGirl said...

ha ha.

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

Nice story, Angel.

Big Sky Heidi said...

That sort of stunt sounds like great fun!

Hell Hound said...

Excellent record to aspire to.

Bilbo said...

Good thing you didn't pick that day to wear the one that hooks in front.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

bilbo, I didn't think of that one!

Banana Oil said...

A stunt like that was tried in Fargo a few years ago.

Banana Oil said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Bastard King of England said...

It wouldn't hurt to show yours, girl!