The French language has a few poetic expressions for le petit mort. One is voir les anges (to see angels). Has any other language described an orgasm so charmingly?
How about some facts about orgasms?
1) The typical female orgasm lasts for about 6 to 10 seconds. Some lucky ladies' may last as long as 20 seconds!
2) "J'ai un mal a la tête"/"I have a headache." Actually, having an orgasm may cure a headache for about 48% of women.
3) About 47% of women take matters into their own hands to have their first orgasm.
4) About 1% of women can orgasm from breast stimulation alone. So much for second base.
5) About 70% of women faked an orgasm. They are good potential actresses.
6) When men orgasm, their brains release chemicals that make them feel sleepy.
7) Women who have two or more orgasms per week may live longer. And live well!
8) Some women faint when they have orgasms.
9) Pigs can have orgasms that last 15 minutes or more. Now that's making bacon with style!
The conventional wisdom is that people loathe taxes; and pay them only because of threats from the government to do so. However, an experiment done over 20 years ago by the Minnesota Department of Revenue regarding compliance in paying taxes came up with an unexpected result. The experiment worked as follows: Those participating in the experiment got one of four possible letters regarding tax payment. (1) A letter emphasizing the social goods that are served by compliance: education, police, fire, health, etc. (2) A letter emphasizing the penalties for non-payment; (3) A letter emphasizing how they could get help in filling out the form; (4) A letter emphasizing that more than 90 percent of Minnesotans already complied by paying their taxes. Which letter seemed to work best? Interestingly enough, extolling the benefits stemming from being a good citizen, threatening penalties for noncompliance, or offering help had little effect on compliance. Only one thing did: the information that most people have already complied by payment of their taxes in the past . The power of example, and the tendency to do like others do, served as a motivator for people. Indeed, the I.R.S. (not a particularly popular governmental agency) might be following a counterproductive strategy by emphasizing penalties for noncompliance in payment of taxes. Why not simply send everyone who pays her or his taxes a note thanking them for paying, like most of their fellow citizens, their taxes? And it would be really nice if the note was written longhand, on nice "thank you note" stationary. A little bit of the personal touch would possibly counter the alienation or the "us versus them" orientation of so many people. The sale of war bonds during World War II showed that. For many, it was one of the ways they could contribute to the war effort.
Princess Lum, after she paid her taxes, was left only with a swim suit and boots. That left her wondering what she would have been her penalty for nonpayment of taxes!
Texas congressman Blake Farenthold (R - Corpus Christi) has vaulted into prominence lately with the startling announcement that he would like to fight a duel with female Congressperson Susan Collins (R - Maine) over their differences over health care legislation. Apparently, he might have seen or read about the currently popular play on Broadway, "Hamilton," and thought that dueling could be a straightforward South Texas way of reconciling political differences. Does he not know that the winner of the famous duel, Aaron Burr, was the villain of the piece; or that dueling is illegal in each of the fifty states? Anyway, the issue behind the health care debate is how best to provide insurance for treatment, not to increase the number of people requiring some form of health care! Anyway, here is Representative Farenthold and a friend showing what a well-dressed Congressperson should wear for sleep attire. I think, that in the service of full disclosure, each of the other 434 Congresspersons and the100 Senators should also pose in their sleepwear. Except for the ones that sleep in the nude, of course.
Congressman Farentholt and a Friend
For his epic performance in his conduct in public office, and for making the residents of the Lone Star State very proud, he seriously deserves an appropriate award for display on the desk in his office:
The Parish School Board officials decided that, in order to justify to the broader and diverse student body and community of Bayou Teche High School, the cheerleaders and cheer squad should support other student and community activities as well. While their presence at football and basketball games was laudable, certain factions of the faculty felt that they should support women's sports and non-sport extracurricular activities. Fair enough. The Cheer Boosters contributed mucho dinero to the basketball and football athletic programs, and the school wanted this largess spread to other areas. Besides, they got enough additional uniforms since Rosie's House of Burlesque and Tanning Parlor donated new uniforms to enhance their halftime performances. In effect, they had an A Cheer Team and a B Cheer Team. Well, they were a bit more stylish than the ones donated by Bordeaux's Garage and Tire Service! First, the cheerleaders performed before the School Board meeting, just to boost school spirit as the Board debated dress codes and budget overruns. In a way, it was harder for the school board members voting for stricter dress codes after seeing the bare midriffs of the cheerleaders. The student body saw this as a good sign. Except for one: the Methodist minister. He did not appreciate being called upon to be a navel inspector, as he was never particularly nautical or naughty. Girls' volleyball fully enjoyed having cheerleaders at their games; as did girls' softball. But, by dividing the squad into smaller components, some cheerleaders appeared to cheer the debate team on their debates with other schools. "Make that argument!" "His reasoning is wrong!" "She has a big butt!" "That's all right team, fight! Fight! But cheerleaders at matches for the chess club definitely put things in the weird zone! They sometimes spontaneously broke out in cheers. Somehow, Shouting out in unison "king him" or "that's all right team, fight! fight!" was not applicable for that sedentary sport!
Semantics, the study of meaning and understanding of words, is worth studying for a variety of ways. Among other things, it helps promote communication. Most of us would have some dissatisfaction with the Humpty-Dumpty Theory of Words, as illustrated by this quotation:
"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean- neither more nor less."
"The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things."
"The question is," said Humpty Dumpty, "which is to be master-that's all."
Alice was too much puzzled to say anything; so after a minute Humpty Dumpty began again.
"They've a temper some of them- particularly verbs: they're the proudest- adjectives you can do anything with, but not verbs- however, I can manage the whole lot of them! Impenetrability! That's what I say!"
You can definitely not look to me as a semantics adept. See Bilbo for that role. However, I recently encountered a real-life semantics issue when I went to lunch in an unfamiliar restaurant and ordered chili. Perusing the menu, I encountered unfamiliar terms such as "three way" and "five way."
Having committed, I tried this new way of serving chili. I'm not a foodie absolutist; growing up in New Orleans allows one to encounter several different ways of doing things. And, I might chauvinistically add, you might encounter good food even in unexpected places, like school or hospital cafeterias.
Okay, it was a runny meat sauce, served on spaghetti! It apparently had a strong ketchup and Worcester sauce-like flavor, and possibly with cumin and even chocolate notes. Whatever be the sins of this meat sauce, it seemed to be entirely venial when it came to chili powder. Much less actual chiles!*
In short, I had encountered Cincinnati chili! This fare is apparently popular there in the Midwest in cafés on beaneries.
I did not find my experience to be edifying; though I strongly believe in everyone following their own preferences. I suggest, however, that this concoction be referred to as "Cincinnati chili" or even "Cincinnati meat sauce." The term "chili" should be reserved for the chili recipes from New Mexico or Texas.
Except for choices of condiments on hot dogs. I side with Dirty Harry on this issue:
*I like the New Mexican practice of referring to the peppers themselves as "chiles" while the Tex-Mex food is called"chili."
As a little change of pace, let me recommend an offbeat, funny, and totally risqué movie: The Little Hours. There's a lot to love in it: lubricious and abusive nuns, randy peasants, witches, a tender ass, a drunken priest, and strange doings set in Medieval times. Alison Brie, Kate Micucci, Aubrey Plaza, Dave Franco, John C. Reilly, and others appear in this romp movie that is likely to be unlike anything else you're likely to see this summer. Don't miss this one! You might need to look for it, as it does not fit into the general mold of the Summer Blockbuster and may not be in theatres catering to the usual mall theatre fare. Furthermore, the storyline comes from one of the tales of The Decameron, by Giovanni Boccaccio (1313-1375). Boccaccio was one racy writer who is a guilty pleasure to read!
Richard Guindon was a Midwestern cartoonist noted for his quirky cartoons. I find his cartoons to be a humor delight. He needs to be honored more as an original of American cartoonists.
My name is Angélique (or Angel). I'm a Cajun native of New Orleans, LA. I'm a
blonde in my learly 30's. I'm married and full-time stay at home mommy of a daughter. Politically, I'm independent, with contrarian leanings.
I still have some traces of my Cajun/Yat accent despite having been in the groves of academe.
I hope you won't mind my odd sense of humor.
