Monday, March 11, 2013

St. Guignolé and Victor Noir: Two Useful Fellows

There is an actual category called phallic saints.  For true, as we say in New Orleans,

In Brest there is a church with a wooden statue of St. Guignolé (Guénolé) that has a long, erect extrusion from its body. It was the practice for Bretons to fondle or cut a small piece off St. Guignolé's apparent virile member as a charm or antidote against impotence.  His manliness seemed inexhaustible; however, that was due to a replaceable dowel placed through the statue.  Men calling on this hypervirile saint would do so to have relief from erectile dysfunction.  Women were particularly interested in him, as rubbing his, er, thingie was a good luck ritual that would increase their sexual enjoyment.

Rumor has it that the Vatican will repackage St. Guignolé as the Saint of Morning Wood.  Sometimes saints can be practical!

In another version, girls stick pins in the foot of his statue in order to find their soulmate.  Ouch!

In Péré LaChaise Cemetery, there is the grave of Victor Noir, a 19th century newsman who was killed in a duel. His recumbent statue on it has a suspiciously large bulge in the crotch area. Supposedly, women rub it to increase their enjoyment of sexual pleasure.  Although the statue is bronze and should be tarnished after being exposed to the elements for over a hundred years, Victor Noir's crotch is shiny!

So much for European sophistication.

Fans of M. Noir


Bilbo said...

A patron saint for Viagra ... who knew?

Duckbutt said...

Victor Noir's monument rivals Chopin's and Jim Morrison's inthe cemetery.

MarkD60 said...

Here we have a mermaid statue underwater. She's all green and crusty except for some very shiny nipples.

TexWisGirl said...

wow! :)

Mike said...

I may have myself bronzed.

Meredith said...

Some saints have it good, some get to be saints by being mortared. That one got it good.

Big Sky Heidi said...

I'd feel a little self-conscious fondling a saint's ding-a-ling.

A great YouTube idea: the saint's statue singing Chuck Berry's "My Ding-a-ling".

bakku-shan said...

I read where the cemetery put a fence around it until ladies complained. Or maybe the bronze guy did.

John Hill said...

I have a costume in mind for next Halloween!

Bilbo said...

I wish I'd thought of Mike's comment first ...

The Mistress of the Dark said...

There's a saint for anything and everything :P

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

There's another recumbent statue there of a French Prez who died while getting oral sex.

The deed is not shown.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Bilbo, Some saints have useful skills.

Duckbutt, good info.

MarkD, Was that for good luck?

Elvis. F. Faure presumably died happy.

Mike, Hmmmm.

John Hill, would that be a R-rated costume?

Mistress, some are just plain odd.

TexWisGirl, That was my thought.

Heidi, That would be a video that would be asge-restricted.

Meredith, It is not known what the phallic saints feel about the attentions they get.