Sunday, September 9, 2012

The Lysistrata Option in Eliminating Nasty Politics

It saddens me that I must suggest that our election year politics has gotten so nasty and so irresponsible that the equivalent to the nuclear option must be deployed to stop it.  I'm referring to the Lysistrata Option!

The Lysistrata Option comes from Aristophanes' classical comedy, Lysistata, in which a large group of Greek women attempt to end the Perlopennesian War by witholding sex from the men, hopefully driving them to peace talks and then the marital bed.  Or just bed, to acknowledge present-day mores.

The play has been enjoyed for over 2300 years because of its outrageous raunchiness, and its proclivity for double entendres:

“Calonice: My dear Lysistrata, just what is this matter you've summoned us women to consider.What's up? Something big?

Lysistrata: Very big.

Calonice: (interested) Is it stout too?

Lysistrata: (smiling) Yes, indeed -- both big and stout.

Calonice: What? And the women still haven't come?

Lysistrata: It's not what you suppose; they'd come soon enough for that."

Some performances of Lysistrata even have the Greek chorus appear with leather phalluses!

Anyway, the Lysistrata Option has on occasion been used in individual circumstances; for example, to modulate the amount of football game-watching in the Fall, as a penalty for bad conduct ("If you persist in emitting flatuses, you'll sleep on the sofa!"), or even because the mood occurs.

Now I cannot say that the ladies are not without blame in this political pretty pass of present: some such as Ann Coulter and Nancy Pelosi relish their role in roiling things up!  And there are weak sisters as well, who pretend to be perfectly okay with this dispiriting disputation.

However, if enough of us, women and men of good sense and will, would deny sex to people who continue these corrosive political parallel monologues, then maybe things could be brought closer to amity.   

And who knows, maybe Clint Eastwood can then go back to talking to the trees instead of chairs!*

*He once appeared in a musical; and sang some song about talking to trees.  He never did another musical.


Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

But Henry Kissinger observed that "power is the ultimate aphrodisiac." Because of this, Lysistrata's approach would be doomed to failure.

In the picture Lysistrata has a cute behind.

Meredith said...

Getting politicians to play nice is a lost cause.

Big Sky Heidi said...

I don't think that option will be necessary on the local level, whether it's inherent politeness of Montanans or simply the awareness thatRomney will carry the state, barring bizarre events.

It's just the national level pols and the internet slugabouts who act politically nasty.

Banana Oil said...

I wish it was that easy!

Mike said...

There will always be a Monica around to egg on the politicians.

Bilbo said...

It's worth a try, but I don't think it would work. The politicians of both parties will continue to get plenty of sex from screwing the Middle Class.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Elvis -- I'm sure she was aware of it!

Meredith -- Probably so

Bilbo -- Touché!

Mike -- Opportunists abound; that's politics

Banana -- Me too!

Heidi -- Some local politics can get nasty too, but rarely in the primaries