I saw a book by this title in the self-help section of a bookstore. It was probably intentionally misfiled by a cynical book stocker in that literary megastore that I was frequenting.
The very notion that men might love bitches is, in a way, unsettling. After all, I have been striving not to be one (with pharmacological assistance sometimes); and the Darwinian implications don't make sense. Yes, I accept that men's mating preferences have been oriented toward youth, pulcritude, and exclusivity in permanent relationships: someone who is healthy, who can bear children, who will be around in the long haul to rear them, and who is relatively faithful. And, yes, playing "hard to get" has been differentially selected as a feminine mating strategy. After all, who wants to play Post Office with third-class males?
But why would a guy want to be saddled with an unpleasant bitch? This seems to be contrary to survival.
For God's sake. Pertuchio, if he had any sense, would have run away from Kate! And, why has Archie Andrews continued to have this crush on Veronica Lodge? Anyone with the nervous system of planaria would have seen Betty Cooper was cuter, nicer, more fun!
Here's my thoughts.
Bitchery is a mate-selection tactic when practiced in mild or moderate doses. Let's face it: bitches are not boring. Here's why.
First of all, let's be honest: other females are usually the major target of Homo bitcheris; guys are usually treated to mild forms of their bitchery. Sorry, guys, but it's true. A lot of true bitch behavior is in order to put down or discommode a possible rival: to put other girls or women in their place. Did you ever notice that many of those alpha überbitches like on Jersey Shore have their own Snooki as a sidekick? And they do kick her sometimes.
Women (and girls) are primarily oriented towards relational rather than physical aggression. As a matter of fact, much of relational aggression may even fly under the radar as bona fide aggression, as far as guys are concerned. Therefore, guys might interpret the bitchiness of a bitch as being high-strung, or catty, or even possibly high-maintenance. Therefore, she can be seen as cute but sometimes annoying.
But girls and women: another matter. They are the ones who shoulder the true extent of bitchiness.
To summarize:
Men
1) Have a higher threshold of perceiving bitchiness, as well as social perception in general.
2) Bitchy behavior may not be perceived, or perceived in a less damaging light.
3) Are most often secondary or occasional targets of bitchiness.
Women:
1) Have a lower threshold of perceiving bitchiness.
2) Perceive bitchiness for what it is at full intensity.
3) Are more often the primary target of bitchiness.
Bitchy women:
1) Are selective in the targets for their bitchiness.
2) Use bitchiness to cut down rivals: casting aspersions on their morals, attractiveness, manners, or origins.
3) Are willing to go for the jugular.
Therefore, bitchiness is, for the women who can pull it off, an adaptive mate-selection and power-enhancement strategy.
Friday Fun Fact
5 hours ago
4 comments:
That makes sense!
Thanks, Duckbutt.
I like your logic here.
You overlook the role of PMS in the process.
Actually, PMS have been a golden excuse . . . .
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