Friday, February 24, 2017

Madame Bernard and the Frisbee

Madame Bernard, although fairly young and pretty, was a total tyrant with her physics students at Bayou Teche High School. And she had a sharp tongue too! What a shame; the juniors at the school were totally scared of this young hoyden of science!

Now it so happened that Tee Tina discovered by accident that Madame Bernard liked to sunbathe in her backyard on Saturdays and Sundays, working on her tan. Now Tee Tina, a fille with ability to delay the gratification, thought that this might be a way to get back at Madame Bernard for the classroom miseries she inflicted, real and imagined.

But how? One possibility is for the boys to hide and emerge as a group to sing a verse:

There are many temptations;
But this one I cannot pass
To see Madame Bernard outside 
Sunbathing her nekkid ass!

But doing this would have blowback big time! They would get a semester of woe from her; not to mention the High Sheriff and the Police Jury getting on their case. The High Sheriff liked the view of her natural features, anyway.

So clearly they had to use subtlety. Now try to find subtlety in Cajun boys or girls. Dat dawg ain't gonna hunt, you know.

It so happened that the guys were into Frisbee golf this spring. Tee Tina, the lightbulb going on in her head, came up with a plan.

She asked her pals, Tee Boudreaux and Tee Thibodaux, if they could place their Frisbee skills to good use, instead of just hitting trees or statchoos with those rubber saucers. Specifically, use a Frisbee to pester Madame Bernard and quickly scooting outa sight! That way, it could be anyone from the Bayou Teche area who threw the Frisbee.

Also, it would be unclear whether anyone saw her, or she had just happened to be hit by a lost Frisbee. This gave the youths some further incentive.

And Tee Tina set up a camera on a tripod in the bushes to catch the action.

Come the afternoon, a tranquil Madame Bernard settled into her repose on the beach blanket to enjoy the warmth of early spring. 

After a half hour or so of ogling the butt of their troubles, Tee Boudreaux launched an experimental Frisbee.

OhMyHolyGod! It went better than planned: it hit Madame Bernard on the middle of her behind! She jerked up as Tee Tina clicked the camera. No flash needed.

There was an irate Madame Bernard, half nekkid, standing up and looking at the Frisbee. Otherwise, nothing to be seen or heard. The garçons and filles decamped quietly and ran back to town. A clean getaway.

Madame Bernard called the deputies, but they had nothing to go on. They guessed that a gust of wind blew the Frisbee off someone's roof. She was annoyed by this nonexpert physics opinion and had a lower opinion of deputies than she did before.

So things cooled down; and the Spring semester went on as usual.

On the last day of school, after the report cards were sent home with the students, there was a really, really, really big commotion in the hall by the cafeteria. It turned out that there were several 8 X 11 pictures on the wall of Madame Bernard that everybody noticed!

Tee Tina got pretty good with her darkroom skills!

The Principal took 'em down; but saved the best one of Mme. Bernard's butt.

Next year the physics students tried a catapult and an egg. Apparently, Madame Bernard was not a quick learner but the next year's students were not as adept with their calculations! The egg missed its target. 






11 comments:

Mike said...

If that's Madame Bernard in the picture I would have kept a picture also. If I saw Madame Bernard on the beach I would politely say, "Excuse me. Butt you need some sand brushed off of you."

Chuck Bear said...

How cheeky!

Cloudia said...

Heh Heh! Fun
"hoy·den
ˈhoidn/Submit
noundated
a boisterous girl."

You keep vocabulary rich! Good on you

Hell Hound said...

Nice tale.

John Hill said...

Angel, your stories and your style always make me smile!

allenwoodhaven said...

Excellent story; very enjoyable read. Thanks to Cloudia for the definition. A good new word is always welcome!

Question: Did you start with the photo and create the story or vice-versa?

bakku-shan said...

That was a clever story.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

allenwoodhaven, I started with the story. :)

Rick Forrestal said...

Such a fine ass! 😏

Duckbutt said...

A nice ending,

Leroy said...

Great story!