The Tall Poppy Syndrome

There's a potentially morale-corroding impulse that absorbs some people: the tendency to denigrate and wish ill of people who have had real accomplishments or who happen to be in the public eye for valid or otherwise reasons.  This is the Tall Poppy Syndrome. 

 

It's a product of envy; and it is often accompanied by schadenfreude when the tall poppy finally gets his comeuppance.  This seems to be what drives magazines that specialize in the dating and marital woes of prominent persons.  And often times a heavy dose of fiction is applied in these recounts.

 

According to various accounts, including the lazy girl's information source: Wikipedia, this is a broad cultural trend in Australia.  It may be positively linked to a preference for the underdog, or negatively by resentment of people with accomplishments. 

 

Obviously, politicians are often a target for this.  And, depending on the slant of the media source, they may subject to this social undercutting.

 

What are the costs of cutting down tall poppies?  Well, if this kind of atmosphere is chronically present, it may discourage the shy, the somewhat motivated, and the neophyte from continually trying.  Or they may emphasize their goal-directed activities primarily in the private sphere.   Do we want to live in a society in which only the incredibly thick-skinned and histrionic people jockey for prominence?  Think Lady Gaga, Dr. Phil, and Donald Trump.  These would be the tall poppies with steel stems!

 

 

 

I will be on a trip for a little over a week; so I will not be posting in the meantime.  I hope you have happy days, and look forward to reading your blogs when I return.

 



Boudreaux and Michelle

Boudreaux and Michelle Devereaux went to the same Parish Church.  Michelle, she go every Sunday and teach de Sunday School.  Boudreaux went on Christmas and Easter and once in a while, he went on one of the other Sundays.  On one of those Sundays, Boudreaux was in the pew right behind Michelle and he notice what a fine looking woman she is.

While dey were taking up the collection, Boudreaux lean forward an' say, "Hey, Michelle, how about you and me go out to supper next Friday?"

"Mais oui, Boudreaux, dat would be nice," say Michelle.

Well, Boudreaux couldn't believe his luck. All week long he polish up his old Ford, and on Friday he picked Michelle up and take her to the finest restaurant in the Parish. She de most beautifulest woman dere, an' Boudreaux's chest feel all swoll up wid havin' her walk in holding his arm.

When they sit down, Boudreaux look over at Michelle and said, "Hey, Michelle, would you like a cocktail before dinner?"

"Oh, no, Boudreaux," say Michelle. "What would I tell my Sunday School class?"

Well, Boudreaux was set back a bit, so he don't say much until after dinner. Then he reach in his pocket and pull out a pack of cigarettes. "Hey, Michelle," say Boudreaux, "Would you like a smoke?"

"Oh, no, Boudreaux," said Michelle. "What would I tell my Sunday School class?"

Well, Boudreaux was feeling pretty low after dat, so he just got in his Ford and was driving Michelle home when dey pass the Motel.  He'd struck out twice already, so he figure he had nothing to lose.  "Hey, Michelle," say Boudreaux, "how would you like to stop at dat dere motel with me?"

"Oui, Boudreaux, dat would be nice," say Michelle. Well, Boudreaux couldn't believe his luck. He did a U-turn right then and there across the median and everyting, and drove back to the motel and check in wit Michelle.

The next morning Boudreaux, he get up first. He look at Michelle lying dere in de bed, her hair all spread out on her pillow. She look all innocent an' young.

"What have I done? What have I done?" thought Boudreaux. He shake Michelle and she wake up. "Michelle, ma cher. I got to ask you one thing," say Boudreaux. "What are you going to tell your Sunday School class?"

Michelle say, "The same thing I always tell dem. You don't have to smoke and drink to have a good time!"

Embrace Your Inner Drama Queen!

The term "drama queen" is 98.2% likely to be a put-down, according to my usual reliable source of statistics.  And, unfortunately, I had been called that on more than one occasion as a teen.

But what the heck?

Maybe the proper response to such a put-down is to accept it, to embrace it for all its possibilities. 

Wear some queenly clothes, like a purple bikini with gauzy harem pants.  Carry a large-size scepter.  Have a nice specially-made crown for informal occasions, like attendance at Wal-Mart.  You must look your best for your adoring subjects.

If you are a drama queen living in the U.K., your ensemble must also include a large, ridiculous hat.  For some reason, Brits expect that of their royalty.  If you are from the U.K. in Lexington, it's okay to wear blue-and-white UK sportswear, like Ashley Judd.

As for how to act, just take your cues from psychiatry.

The point of being a drama queen is that you must create drama.  To learn how to do this, the best way is to look up histrionic personality disorder in Wikipedia.  Or DSM-IV-TR, if you must go to the roots like an academic fussbudget.  Basically, this refers to a pervasive pattern of excessive emotionality and attention seeking, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

• Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention -- seize the moment, grab attention.
• Interaction with others is often characterized by inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior -- "Am I too décollété?"
• Displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions -- Keep 'em off-balance; make it interesting.
• Consistently uses physical appearance to draw attention to themself -- Dress outrageously.
• Has a style of speech that is excessively impressionistic and lacking in detail
• Shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion -- Understate nothing.
• Is highly suggestible, i.e., easily influenced by others or circumstances
• Considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are -- Everyone needs to feel like your confidant or even your potential lover.

But, above all, have fun!  Your loyal subjects expect it of you!*

*People with some psychiatric diagnoses have more fun.

No Bong Hits 4 Jesus

In 2007, in Morse v. Frederick, the Supreme Court held that school administrators could suppress students' speech at a school event if they perceived that it promoted illegal drug use.  Somehow, that strange abridgement of free speech was worthy of a song:


No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life
Though the days are long and no end in sight
Straight through the times you need to take flight
No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life.


Make me, oh make me, Lord one righteous doubee
Give me a hit to make me carefree
Free from the grumpy SCOTUS below
I’ve got the weed, Lord, and it's better than snow.


No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life
Though the days are long and no end in sight
Straight through the times you need to take flight
No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life.


Take all the bros and their righteous tokes
And all of the sistahs who married good blokes
Thank my dumbass kin for all that moonshine
It kicks like a mule, but you feel fine.


No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life
Though the days are long and no end in sight
Straight through the times you need to take flight
No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life.


Yeah, no bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life
Though the days are long and no end in sight
Straight through the times you need to take flight
No bong hits 4 Jesus through the hard times of life.

 

(Sung to the tune of Dropkick Me, Jesus, Through the Goalposts of Life) 

Next week is International Clitoris Week.  I thought I'd touch on the subject.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/02/international-clitoris-we_n_3202780.html

To Thong or Not To Thong

Let's talk about thongs.

 

Among my great insights regarding these items is that they immediately open to confusion: is the user referring to a type of undergarment, or a very casual type of footwear?  Maybe we should use separate, unequivocal terminology: backless underpants and shower shoes.  This caused some confusion a few years ago when newspaper fashion mavens tut-tutted about some girls' athletic team visiting the White House and some were wearing thongs!  Sorry, newsies, no immodesty or lésé majesté intended!

 

This is compounded by the common misprounciation of the word tong.  A tong can either be the word for a grasping tool used by barbecuers, or a Chinese secret society.  Therefore, using a thong to turn your meat on the grill is not advised, using tongs is!  And a thong war is not likely to break out in Chinatown, unless it's in a strip club!

 

Another observation of the Rick Romero variety is that thongs are a delight when worn by an attractive person of the opposite sex, not yourself.  You see, there's the strap thingy to deal with!  And thongs have a way of riding up in a way that is particularly evident if the person is wearing lowrider jeans -- the dreaded or aspired to whale tail!

 

[I was going to tell one whale of a tail of whale tales, or is it the other way around?]

 

Anyway, thongs can serve a cultural function.  They can serve as something to focus on when you want to deal with anxiety:  Imagine you're a novice lawyer arguing before the Supreme Court.  You can deal with performance anxiety by imagining the nine Supremes all wearing thongs!  Oops, there goes your lunch!

 

Or imagine our Presidential candidates speaking while wearing thongs.

 

They can be used to differentiate your vehicle in parking lots, or for major celebrations:

 

 

 

Thongs can even provide an excuse for increasing the role of government.  Under the provisions of the Interstate Commerce Act, it is possible to conceive of the government adopting regulations governing the sale of these articles of fashion, licensing who may sell them, and restricting who may or who may not wear them.  

 

But, would this provide another point of political contention, as if we don't have enough, already.  I can see Conservatives eschewing thongs as a protest against government encroachment, and Liberals adopting, enduring, and openly hinting that they're wearing a thong, just to indicate that they're cool with the government regulating their underwear!  The Rev. Billy Bob Driscoll observed that thongs are a Deity's punishment on people who are liberals!  

 

 



 

 

Provocative T-Shirt

 

There are a few t-shirts that probably should not be worn, even in a sense of irony.   Anyway, irony is often overlooked by many observers.

 

I'm familiar with the term 'Alpha Bitch,' presumably the feminine form of 'Alpha Dog,' the dominant dog in the pack.  For the more conventional, 'alpha male' and 'alpha female' apply appropriately to the species Homo sapiens with no aspersions.  When worn on a shirt, they seem totally presumptuous.

 

But, getting back to the Alpha Bitch t-shirt, it comes in several designs and colors.  This one comes in eight different colors: red, blue, black, gray, etc.  It sells for $24.95; it is hard to imagine someone wearing one, yet I've seen more than one in real life.  What are people thinking?

 

Shirts like this make a good case for at least minimal dress codes. 

 

I cannot imagine someone wearing one on an occasion for possibly meeting guys.  Maybe the message has the same effect as 'I've got herpes!"  And, it's true: some women (and girls) are bitches (like the four in Mean Girls); but the smart strategy for mean girls is to disguise it.

 

And how is the message going to be received?  Some guys may take it as a challenge; and some gals, too.  The wearer may inspire thoughts of the type, "No you're not; I'M THE ALPHA BITCH!"  Will that result in what some guys want to see: a cat fight?  [I'm not sure why guys like this; it's not like the fighters' skill is very much.....]

 

And wearing a message shirt means that anyone period can read it.  Can you imagine someone's granny's reaction on seeing her granddaughter in one?

 

As a matter of fact, the only setting I can imagine wearing one of these t-shirts is in a wet t-shirt contest.

 

 

When Are You Going to Marry and Settle Down?

This is an oft-posed question to unmarried, not permanently-situated young adults in their mid-20's.  Talk about posing a personal question!   The subtext is almost "when are you going to start having children and being responsible, for a change?" 

Some of it is due to the fact that at one time young adults married earlier: 22 was the average age for men, 20 for women.  Nowadays, it's close to 28 for men and 25 for women.  In other words, there's a layer of intergenerational perspective differences to start with.  Older people had gotten married at an earlier age; they assume that it's still the norm.

But there's some other things going.  One is the envy of the unmarried young adult being free of responsibilities.  It's disengenuous to assume that working at an entry-level service job (like a barista) provides the material resources for being really free of responsibilities.  And for many of us, there are the student loans to pay back.  Most of us manage.  Somehow.

There's even the cohabitation issue as well.    Eeek!  A girl living with a guy!  The incidence of unmarried cohabitants has increased dramatically in the past 20 years.  As a result, some elders perceive that there's all this wild sex going on.  In reality, the fact that a man and woman are living together does not mean automaically that they are having sex: some might be lovers, some might be friends with benefits, but a sizeable number simply are roommates!  [Yes, even sharing a bed with no sex.  Supposedly married couples do that too.  :-)]  Still, there's the excessive fear of premarital sex.  Sufficient to say, if a man and woman are living togther, most of us Millenials assume that they're also sleeping together.  And it's no big deal!

The process of getting an education in part of it too.  First of all, few individuals complete their undergraduate studies in four years; if they work part-time (as many do), it may take five or six years.  Secondly, there's graduate school.  Depending on the level, this can run four or five more years.  At no time in the student's career is he or she living a ostentatious lifestyle!  Graduate student life is somewhat halfway between the old 1960's-type settled down life and college student life without the frat parties.  First of all, some are married and even might have young children.  secondly, there's a desire for small comforts, like dining on nice plates, relaxing at the shore rather than the rowdy Spring Break experience, having a lover, keeping a pet or two.  Some I know would even aspire to the Rotary Club, if they qualified.  And one is a deacon at church.

A desire for travel is another factor.  It's really easier to travel if you're single and casually employed.  Certain occupations take a dim view of workers who take extended periods for travel.

Even those young adults who are working usually are given entry-level salaries.  Even when a couple's resources are pooled, it might not be enough.  It's awkward for a couple to live together in one of their parents' household, so they often live separately and look for the occasional prospect for privacy.  Some parents actually abet that by making themselves scarce around those occasions.  [I hope this is not too surprising a revelation.]

Anyway, it's not just the Otakus who live in their parents' basements; even engaged couples might.  I think it's a form of family resiliance that families can be flexible about their moral judgments when circumstances force them to be.

There is some money that has to be accumulated to purchase the materials for a household: furniture, appliances, health insurance. cars, and so forth.  Plus there's rent.  In the meantime, millenials are in a state of flux or transition: approaching that "settled down" condition by increments.  Some household items, like chairs and sofas, might be literally cast off.  There's a end-of-semester furniture scavenging that goes on in some university towns.

Of course, the biggest determinant is pregnancy.  Babies impose nonnegotiable demands.  That's when the traditional settling down occurs.

There's some good news to consider: Couples who marry when they're older tend to have more stable marriages.