Talking About Pregnancy

Euphemisms are mild or pleasant words that serve to soften the delivery of a more direct concept, such as 'passed away" instead of "died," "seeking new opportunities" or "made redundant" instead of "unemployed," "expecting" instead of "pregnant," and so forth. 

Now euphemisms have their skanky sisters as well: dysphemisms. Thus we can speak of people as having "bought the farm," "fired,"  "knocked up."  This is the province of the dysphemism. In these ungentle times dysphemisms seem to be on an upswing in usage. Sometimes they're used as cheap means for shocking others; sometimes they're naked expressions of aggression.

Sometimes dysphemisms are used to take someone down a peg, like "croaker" or "sawbones" for physician, "shrink" for psychiatrist or clinical psychologist, or "ambulance chaser" for lawyer. We can also throw in such terms for intellectual disability: "moron," "imbecile," and "idiot," which used to be technical terms.

But let's confine ourselves to how refer to being pregnant. For a completely natural (and sometimes enjoyable) state humans with a way with words find many ways of talking around it. To be honest, it is considered gauche* to ask someone is pregnant because she might not be, or has not formally announced this to all and sundry.

(There is a certain protocol to be observed: parents, grandparents, and in-laws first; then close friends; before co-workers or casual acquaintances.)

Still, it's unsettling that so many people find it necessary to resort to euphemisms: like they treat it as a shameful state not to be mentioned in polite company

Anyway, here's a number of substitute terms, ranging from euphemisms to dysphemisms:

In a delicate condition -- This term suggests: treat me like a princess! This is so cute and Victorian! Still, I'd rather be seen in a delicate condition than some of the others.

Expecting -- Unless you're talking to high school seniors, this does not mean she's expecting letters of admission to colleges!

Pregnant -- Being forthright and honest goes a long way. Let's face it: no need to pretend how this happened!

In an interesting condition -- She's pregnant; but with some problems. Like not being married, being over age 40 and thus at risk for having a baby with Down's syndrome, having an absent spouse, or other possible story line.

Having a bun in the oven -- Cutesy; used only by maiden aunts. Put cinnamon and sugar on mine.

With child -- Sort of blunt; like she picked up a disease or something. 

Being late -- Sort of like the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland?

In a family way -- I don't like this one simply because it denigrates the couple as less than a full family until baby comes along.

Preggers -- Pardon me while I twroh up in de garbage can!

Knocked up -- Now this dysphemism implies that the pregnancy was unplanned, unwanted, and burdened with societal disapproval! Never mind the baby was planned, desired, and the couple achieved all the criteria for couplehood!

Successfully screwed -- OMFG!

But I think that a lot of the diffidence governing how pregnancy is due to people reflecting on how it came about. So, because that happened to me, I'll say simply that I was successfully laid and enjoyed every minute of it!

*Seeing that I'm left-handed, you might linguistically expect a certain amount of gauchery from me!