Let's face it: one component that lingers under the surface in boy-girl gifts is the erotic. There's a little of the old Adam and Eve in us: we like a little erotic kick from time to time, although societal norms constrain us to pretend otherwise. Obviously, I'm not taking about brother-sister giftings (except possibly in Vermont and West Virginia). No, I'm talking about boyfriend-girlfriend gifts.
There's an additional component, the public versus the private, to take into account. Believe me (speaking from firsthand experience), it is mighty embarassing to open a present at a party and find that your boyfriend had given you a matching black-and-pink semitransparent lacy teddy-and-panties set! The reason? Everyone in attendance automatically assumes that we were being intimate (shall we say), even though we weren't.
The damnest thing is, however, is that I liked the outfit! I did indicate to my boyfriend that I loved his thoughtfulness.
You might not believe this, but I asked my Mama about it. She inspected the (almost) garment, and asked me what I felt about it. I admitted that being given it in public was embarassing, but that I liked it. It made me feel special and beautiful.
Her advice was very practical: Keep the teddy and panties, and wear them in private when I needed to feel special.
Anyway, my suggestion to readers about intimate gifts is this: bestow an intimate gift only on someone you are intimate with; and always give those kinds of gifts privately!
There's an additional component, the public versus the private, to take into account. Believe me (speaking from firsthand experience), it is mighty embarassing to open a present at a party and find that your boyfriend had given you a matching black-and-pink semitransparent lacy teddy-and-panties set! The reason? Everyone in attendance automatically assumes that we were being intimate (shall we say), even though we weren't.
The damnest thing is, however, is that I liked the outfit! I did indicate to my boyfriend that I loved his thoughtfulness.
You might not believe this, but I asked my Mama about it. She inspected the (almost) garment, and asked me what I felt about it. I admitted that being given it in public was embarassing, but that I liked it. It made me feel special and beautiful.
Her advice was very practical: Keep the teddy and panties, and wear them in private when I needed to feel special.
Anyway, my suggestion to readers about intimate gifts is this: bestow an intimate gift only on someone you are intimate with; and always give those kinds of gifts privately!
6 comments:
Great advice! Both for the donor and the donee!
Who knows, ramping up the level of intimacy might work also!
Why be coy about intimacy? If you are, let everyone know, except Grandma!
The convention about intimate gifts is long passé.
I would have immediately tried it on, and model it for everyone present!
How old were you? Aren't you relying too much on your mother's advice in this area?
Sometimes the inhibitions of your Catholic education come through.
In my opinion, it's okay to bestow an intimate gift. But it should be done privately.
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