Oh well, he thought; time to make a lemonade out of a lemon. But when he surveyed the town, named because of its flat terrain, he thought that the town was aptly named for another reason. "Hmmm . . . .", he thought, would "Plainville, The Windy City do?" But he was disappointed that Chicago already took that slogan as one of its. "Okay, do they have any events or festivals of note? Nope, none at all. Well, double damn!"
Matt was fast running through all the ideas in his trusty book, Public Relations for Dummies, when he came up with the suggestion to employ some local agriculture or industry as a public relations theme. Unfortunately, the various farmers in the area had bad luck in agriculture and the remaining ones were left growing ragweed and cannabis. Those would do, obviously! Besides, the pot-growers would rather as little publicity as possible.
So it came to manufacturing. Fortunately, Plainville did have one industry, the Schön Bustenhalter Werks that manufactured bras for export to Europe That could be a problem, both product-wise and the fact that it had no presence in the American mindset. A bra festival, maybe; a bustenhalter one, no soap.
But Matt, a graduate with honors from Southwest Kentucky State University, though he was up to the challenge. Matt buckled down and thought some more. Why not generate some ideas for festivals to draw people in, like a Renaissance Faire or a Cornhole Toss Festival. Or maybe honor some local resident who became prominent in the slogan he was trying to develop.
Unfortunately, the only resident of Plainview to achieve prominence was Dudley Slipokoff, who was executed in the State Prison back in 1899. Matt thought, "Maybe I shouldn't mention this. There could still be strong feelings about this after only 116 years."
Likewise, the indigenous cuisine, featuring such fare as five bean casserole and hot dish seemed uninspired to generate state-wide, much less national, interest.
So it was back to the bras. Then Matt Winsocki thought that maybe he could combine the two, the industry and the festival. This inspiration almost wrote a slogan in itself:
"Plainville: The Home of the Schön Bustenhalter Werks and the Not Plain Bra Festival" Now that was an award-winning idea! But, just to be safe, he proposed incorporating it into a Indiana State Cornhole Toss Festival!
The final slogan, which was adopted enthusiastically by the Town of Plainville as: "The Home of the Indiana State Cornhole Toss Festival and the Schön Bustenhalter Werks." That was full of win. They could exploit a Bavarian theme, with bier und bratwurst and perhaps dirndle-wearing beauties!
The Cornhole Toss Boards |
It's funny how terms can suddenly change meaning... dramatically. Look up cornhole in the urban dictionary and see what it has meant for as long as I can remember.
ReplyDeleteA very ... uplifting ... story.
ReplyDeleteMike, it seems to be a regional recreation which can confuse outsiders.
ReplyDeleteBilbo, I'm glad to uplift things a bit.
haha. laughing at bilbo's comment.
ReplyDeleteCornholing is popular in KY and OH.
ReplyDeleteI've actually played the GAME once.
ReplyDeleteAngel, I'm always amazed at the stories you come up with, and this one is priceless! I think my daughter had one of these for my grandson's birthday party!
ReplyDelete*Snicker*
ReplyDeleteALOHA Angel
ComfortSpiral
=^..^=
At least they offer more than a plain white bra.
ReplyDelete