What Is the Most Inappropriate Place for a First Date?

The all-important first date! It's a social situation that requires a certain amount of finesse in which both parties should behave well and hopefully the setting would be comfortable and allow for both to become better acquainted. It's an occasion for testing the waters of a possible relationship, and should include opportunities for conversation. Yes, talk is important, guys and gals! A few how-to-do-it articles have been written about where to take her (or him) that you plan to date. There are the old standbys: dinner, coffee, or a movie. Unfortunately (or fortunately), choice of those settings reveals little about the self. There is a philosophy of first dating that view an imaginative choice of setting is a winning approach; one that guarantees that there will be a second date, followed by a third. However, some people have not really learned basic rudiments of socially appropriate behavior, and fail dismally!

Recently, Fark.com had a thread in which people could contribute possible inappropriate settings. Some of those seemed very funny to me; but be warned that there's the same snarkiness from internet lurkers that have way too much time on their hands. In a serious vein, I propose that a list of where not to set the first date is good supplementary advice for where not to take her/him!

Accordingly, the Love Goddess Angélique offers this basic list of not so good settings for a first date:

1. A Whoopie Cushion factory.

2. A strip show.

3. Shooting rats at the city dump.

4. A wet t-shirt contest in which the person invited is expected to participate.

5. The morgue.

6. A biker bar.

7. A wrestling match.

8. To get your dog's anal glands expressed.

9. To an adult toy store.

10. To visit your mother in prison.

11. For breakfast at McDonald's.

12. To your group therapy session.

13. A double date with Nancy Grace.

14. A political rally.

15. A used car lot.

16. Crimea.

17. Jersey Shore.

18. Night court.

19. A Nickleback concert.

20. A cheerleading competition.

21. A master's oral exam.

22. A sperm bank..

23. A bus depot to play pinball there.

24. To see a Mariah Carey impersonator show.

25. A guided tour of Orleans Parish Prison.
26. Hooters.
27. A dance club, with loud music.
28. To accompany you when you buy some weed.
29. Detention.
30. Your family's Thanksgiving dinner.
31. To hang out at your house or apartment.
32. A cockfight.
33. To listen to Rush Limbaugh.
34. A wedding chapel in Vegas, even if Elvis performs the ceremony.

Okay, I gave a few bad ideas. Can you offer a few additional lousy ideas for a first date? Let your inhibitions run wild, as Rod Stewart sang in the song "Tonight's the Night (Gonna Be Alright).