Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Freedom Fries, Freedom Toast, and Other Nomenclature Changes

Years ago (around 2003 or so), when the U.S. wasn't getting along very well with France, a dutiful congressperson proposed that French fries be henceforth referred to as "Freedom Fries."  Presumably, this would apply to French toast as well.

 There's a little bit of irony here: Both French fries and French toast originated in BELGIUM!

 At least we got the Belgian waffle right!

 But what about another alleged entity from the hexagone: the French tickler?  Did this get overlooked during this period of jingoism, bad taste, and questionable nomenclature change?

 No.  "The Bedroom Bunker," an adult pleasure store in Colorado Springs, found that sales of French ticklers dropped due to anti-French sentiment.  In response to this, they renamed their latex-studded vibrators "Freedom ticklers."  This product was already colored red, white, and blue.

 Which also happen to be the colors on the French flag!
The Freedom Tickler

http://www.bannoy.com/article

    









Curiously enough, I don't think anyone saw fit to refer to "Freedom kissing" instead of "French kissing."  Perhaps the practice of French kissing is still viewed as morally questionable by a number of people that they are still very willing to impute Gallic origins to that mutually delicious activity.

I wonder what "English kissing" would be like.







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13 comments:

  1. Chuck the Grumpy CatMay 13, 2014 at 7:14 AM

    English kissing would be as bland as their food.

    Freedom ticklers. I like that.

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  2. Chuck the Grumpy CatMay 13, 2014 at 7:14 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. Chuck the Grumpy CatMay 13, 2014 at 7:14 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. Atomic DogMay 13, 2014 at 7:32 AM

    When the silliness regarding French fries was going on, I wondered where that would ultimately go.

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  5. Grand CrapaudMay 13, 2014 at 8:26 AM

    It's a way of combining sex and patriotism. Three cheers for the red, while, and blue. (George M. Cohan music for background.)

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  6. AnemoneMay 13, 2014 at 9:37 AM

    French ticklers and other ribbed rubbers are overrated.

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  7. The Bastard King of EnglandMay 13, 2014 at 11:12 AM

    Do French ticklers involve the placebo effect?

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  8. MikeMay 13, 2014 at 12:33 PM

    Red white and blue are the most common colors for flags of the countries of the world.

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  9. BilboMay 13, 2014 at 12:57 PM

    If I, as an American, French-kiss my German wife, am I beng insufficiently sexually patriotic? Ask me if I care.

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  10. Elvis Wearing a Bra on His HeadMay 13, 2014 at 6:37 PM

    What? Are there people who object to French kissing? They might also object to sex while standing. People might think they're dancing.

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  11. eViL pOp TaRtMay 13, 2014 at 6:59 PM

    Mike, a good point. The product could also be sold as Norwegian ticklers.

    Bilbo, I would not presume to doubt.

    Chuck, I never tried it.

    King, that would require research.

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  12. CloudiaMay 13, 2014 at 9:31 PM

    Legendary bad English teeth preclude my thinking much about your estimable query, scholar!




    ALOHA from Honolulu
    ComfortSpiral

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  13. Insane PenguinMay 14, 2014 at 9:32 PM

    They forgot to rename French bulldogs Freedom bulldogs.

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